Difficult conversations are one of the worst parts of management. Whether you’re telling an employee he’s been slacking off too much lately or you’re trying to help an employee learn how to 
manage customer tensions, the subject matter isn’t easy to approach. During the holiday season, these conversations become exponentially more difficult.
The holidays bring about more emotions, tension and frustration. Employees are dealing with the regular stressors of a busy season. Your customers are unusually highly strung as they try to tackle their shopping lists while toting around small children. When you need to have a sit down conversation about a tough subject, you might find yourself more nervous than the person you’re talking to.
How do you ensure the exchange is smooth and painless? Here are a few tips to help.
Don’t Surprise Your Employees
It might be easier to talk to your employees when the timing is right, such as during a slow period in your store. However, this can catch your employee off guard causing his defenses to suddenly rise.
Schedule a time for you and your employee to talk. This gives him time to prepare, which will make the conversation easier. It also blocks out a time on your master schedule so the rest of the team knows not to interrupt. This will come in handy during a potentially emotionally charged moment.
Plan to a Point
As you anticipate the impending conversation, it’s normal for you to make plans for how it’ll all go. Writing notes for yourself and collecting specifics can prove beneficial. But be careful how much planning you do.
Over planning for difficult conversations is a recipe for disaster. Instead of the talk looking like a two-way conversation, it’ll start to feel like a firing round putting the employee on the defense.
It’ll also make you sound scripted and insincere. It’s hard to reach a resolution or make headway when your employee isn’t sure what he’s supposed to say to you. This type of confusion isn’t worth the risk.
Take a Deep Breath
As you sit down at the table, don’t forget to breathe. You’re just as nervous as the person across from you. Spitting out your key points in rapid fire will make it harder for your employee to know how to respond. Instead, breathe deeply. Speak slowly. You have time to make your point. Don’t rush it.
Listen
Although you might not think your employee has a defense, you might be surprised. The best managers are those who listen to their employees needs. They hear their concerns and address them with an understanding, compassionate attitude. Before you react, listen and absorb. Hear what your employee is truly saying so you can walk away from the tough conversation with a strong resolution in mind.
Recapping
Scheduling and planning your tough conversations will help you and your employee be better prepared for what is about to be discussed. While in the conversation, breathe deeply and come up for air long enough to let your employee respond. The better you listen, the more likely you both will be to reach a resolution.