Stuck on a project charter review call with the Hand-Wringers? Sitting through yet another B2C webinar they promised had business content and doesn’t?  Bored with the Keebler Elves’ mandatory due diligence training module? Time for some distractions!  Here are a few incredibly distracting links which are defensible if the Thought Police audit your online wanderings.

Being Productive – No, seriously
I love Time Management Ninja and this may be my favourite recent post from them. It’s 14 dangerous ways you can actually get stuff done. Things like skipping time-wasting meetings, not checking email and going somewhere to hide (not the same place you go to cry).

OMG! WDH a MobiStrat! WTF?
(trans: Goodness, we haven’t a strategy for mobile marketing! What ever shall we do?)

If one of your Gen Y sales reps has helpfully dumped that world of hurt into your inbox and you have no idea how to respond, read this wonderful ebook from CK Kerley. It’s just for B2B and won’t waste your time with things like flash mobs and teenagers. It’s got video, real examples and lots of links and it’s not a preachy Ritual Shaming.

And Speaking of Shame
If you’re still trying to teach your Corporate Overlords to spell social marketing, then you will want this post from the ladies at Savvy B2B. It’s just for people who are a little late to the game and it’s part of a larger series that puts said game into perspective for B2B marketers. Plus there’s a hare.

The Just-Because-You-Can-Doesn’t-Mean-You-Should Department
Some of those who have been at the social marketing thing a little while are maybe getting a little too enthusiastic about it. Mark Schaefer makes a great case for NOT forcing your employees to tweet, text and blog every time they reload a stapler. The reasons include a lack of skill, discretion and anything of interest to say. Many of the same reasons executives should avoid social media.

The Just-Because-You-Haven’t-Doesn’t-Mean-You-Shouldn’t Department
Just the other day I was chatting with a friend who is looking for work. I asked if she had updated her LinkedIn and rounded up a few recommendations. She said, “What’s LinkedIn?” Sigh. I would bet that if you looked up your top 15 Corporate Overlords on LinkedIn you would find at least a few missing entirely and most of those present with a handful of connections and a photo from 2002.  Why B2B spends so much time with it’s head up the arse of Facebook and ignores LinkedIn is beyond me. Happily, MarketingProfs has a collection of case studies on how real companies use this tool. It’s $49 and money well spent if you haven’t got a clue about where to start with this one.

The World Needs More Smart People
And if they happen to be smartasses as well, then that’s a bonus. Normally I’m terrified of motivational speakers. They’re so, I don’t know, motivated. And since I’m basically as lazy as a sales rep on the first day of the quarter, I view them with deep suspicion. Not this guy: Avish Parashar has a marvellous blog which addresses such timeless topics as why stupid people get ahead, how to suck more than you already do at a breakout session and great motivational tunes from the 1980s (who knew?)

I have downloaded his free e-book and keep meaning to read it. Just can’t seem to get motivated…

You Need to Look Like You’re One of the Smart People
When they come for you in the night (OK, so it’s usually at 2:30pm) will you be able to stand up to the relentless accusations, pointless questions, acronyms you dare not ask about and other indecent violations?  Better take the Buyersphere Report. It’s from BaseOne in the UK  and it’s full of fun facts and pretty charts that will appeal to the most bitter of the Finance Serfs. They don’t have to know the data are from Western Europe, and it really doesn’t matter because this survey of how P-Cubers, F-Worders and all the creatures in the B2B forest find stuff out and make decisions shouldn’t be much different than it is on this side of the Atlantic.  It’s also a longish document so if all else fails you can whack your auditor across the snout and get a head start to the elevators.