fuel cards chocolate5. Chocolate

If your initial reaction to this was: ‘What an unjustifiable waste of the heaven-sent sugary goodness!’, then you are, like me dear readers, an ardent chocoholic and won’t stand for a future that prioritises, that old chestnut ‘the environment’ over a basic human need. Fortunately, it appears researchers aim to use waste chocolate from bad batches and combine the fats found in chocolate with starch and other waste food materials to create a Biofuel. Or is that what they want people like me to think?

If this becomes popular (or worse, incredibly reliable) and the new alternative fuel source in town, could chocolate become prohibited as a comfort food? It doesn’t bear thinking about. Probably best not to tell earth activists that my monthly intake of chocolate alone could power five Land Rovers for an around the world trip.

4. Coffee

Not the oddest of choices considering it provides many of us with our morning fuel; dry coffee grounds can be converted into flammable gas, and successfully powered a car from London to Manchester in March 2010. Scientific creativity aside, the expense and effort is staggering, with a need to make stops every 40 to 60 miles to add new granules and replace coffee filters etc. I can’t see this one taking off in petrol stations anytime soon.

3. Nappies

Yes, dirty nappies are actually an incredibly reliable and cost-effective fuel solution thanks to a Canadian company bringing the less-than-sweet smell of success to our attention. It has been worked out that around 30,000 tons of the stuff can be transformed annually into 10,000 tons of diesel fuel. Impressive – especially when you consider that by the time children reach the age of two and a half, the average toddler will have racked up a pong-tastic total of around 6,500 nappies. It’s a no-brainer: that’s a hell of a lot of fuel!

2. Paper

It seems unlikely but just about any paper or cardboard waste could be our planet’s saviour and a genuinely efficient alternative to currently harmful fuels. Anything from old letters and bank statements can be transformed into fuel through a means of washing and pre-treating the paper waste. And now for the amazing science-y bit – the enzymes created in this process convert the waste into sugars and these sugars are fermented down to make efficient car fuel. Strange but true.

1. Human Fat

In at number one and perhaps the most disturbing alternative fuel concept – human fat. Or, more specifically, excess fat from cosmetic liposuction procedures. While currently illegal (small wonder why) this hasn’t stopped a few boffins from giving it a shot. Plastic surgeon, Dr. Bittner, a favourite among Hollywood clientele has admitted to using his patient’s waste fat to run both his and his girlfriend’s car. I’m not sure I’m happy with the idea of making it across the motorway on rejected love handles… but each to their own.

Until one of these becomes viable, we’ll have to stick to normal fuel – and for that, we recommend buying with one of our fuel cards to save money and improve cashflow. Hundreds of filling stations accept our cards across the UK; take a look at the benefits and request an info pack today.