Bob’s Burgers Restaurant Valued At $796,446 (Infographic)

Bob’s Burgers Restaurant For Sale

Just in case you haven’t noticed yet, there’s this awesome show called “Bob’s Burgers” on Fox, and it’s kinda my favorite thing on TV right now. Following along with Bob, Linda, and their three rambunctious kids as they try to make a burger joint profitable is hilarious and a much needed break from reality. From the burger of the day to the Easter-egg signs in the opening, there’s so much to discover and enjoy.

Well, I also happen to work at a real estate company, so there were a few things I really wanted to discover. Bob is always complaining about his rent, but how much would that building be worth? Where is this restaurant located?

When the Movoto Real Estate Blog gave me the opportunity to research this bizarre abode and answer these questions, I was all over it. Not quite Tina’s-love-for-Jimmy-Jr. obsessed, but definitely getting there. I grabbed a burger from my local In-N-Out, watched every episode on Netflix, and did some serious math. In the end, I found that Bob would have to fork over at least $796,446 to buy the place from Mr. Fischoeder.

But did I stop there? Oh no. Like with Linda and wine, I definitely don’t know when to stop.

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The Grand Re-Re-Re-Opening

This show is all about the fart jokes, butts, puns, and mischief, and that’s definitely where the value of it lies. But, to determine the would-be real estate value of the restaurant, we needed to ask ourselves some pretty important questions:

  • How big is the restaurant/house?
  • Where is it located?
  • How much would a similarly sized place cost there?
  • How much would it cost to rent the place per month?
  • How many burgers would you need to sell to live there?

Using all that, I’d be able to determine how much a real life version of that place would go for on the market. Okay, those last two criteria are just to add a little bit of reality to the realty, and for fun. Seriously, what would Bob’s Burgers be without fun, anyway?

Just Stay The Heck Out Of The Extra “Bedroom”

BobAs we saw in the episode “Bed & Breakfast,” there are a ton of upstairs bedrooms as well as the restaurant downstairs. By the way, that fourth bedroom, Louise’s, was actually originally a closet. My guess is she demanded her own room rather than sleep near Tina’s late-night thrashings.

So there’s a little novelty real-estate trivia for ya. But how much space does this place really have altogether? There aren’t any set floor plans for this house and eatery, so I had to go episode by episode in the show itself to figure out the layout for myself. In my research, I found that the building is made up of:

  • The restaurant/kitchen
  • 1 customer bathroom
  • 3 bedrooms
  • 1 walk-in closet-turned-bedroom
  • Upstairs Kitchen/dining room
  • 1 living room
  • Upstairs bathroom
  • Basement (ie. The Meatgrinder)

What I didn’t include is the hallway, attic, not-so-secret crawl spaces, or walk in freezer. After all, no one lives in those, except maybe when Linda’s parents came to visit. That’s a lot of rooms, especially considering how small the place looks from the outside. Ah well, maybe like The Tardis, it’s bigger on the inside. There was only one way to find out.

Jeeze-Louise, These Calculations Are Hard!

I had some fun when finding out the measurements in this place. Because I did it all by hand, I needed a point of reference. For that, I have to thank Linda’s love of being drunk. Excuse me, “having fun.”

Most wine bottles are 12 inches tall. Using that, I determined the height of one of my favorite characters in the show, and one of the only characters that goes into literally every room in the house: Louise.

With the ears (and seriously, when is she without the ears?), Louise came out to 4.6 feet tall, and from there it was just a matter of using her as a reference point in every room of the house. They came out to the following:

  • Restaurant: 275 square feet
  • Kitchen: 196 square feet
  • Customer bathroom: 29 square feet
  • Basement: 412 square feet
  • Bob and Linda’s bedroom: 245 square feet
  • Tina’s bedroom: 197 square feet
  • Gene’s bedroom: 213 square feet
  • Louise’s “bedroom”: 62 square feet
  • Kitchen/dining room: 197 square feet
  • Upstairs bathroom: 50 square feet
  • Living room: 182 square feet

All that comes out to a total of 2,058 square feet.

Now, the place does seem pretty top-heavy, but keep in mind that the lower part has a ton of fridges, meat lockers, storage, crawlspaces, and the long stairway up to the living area, so it all comes out about right.

But all that doesn’t tell us how much it would cost to live here. And considering the fact that bob’s always complaining about his rent, it’s got to be something significant, right? As it turns out, yeah, it is significant. But how did we figure that out? We had to determine where Bob’s restaurant is located.

Mr. Fischoeder Owns This Town

Yes, he’s got everything under his thumb or on his payroll, but what city is he and his psycho brother ruling over?

After some Internet research, I found out some pretty interesting stuff on that subject. It turns out that they are supposed to live in a “Simpsons”-esque everyman’s town, but that wasn’t always the case.

Initially, the show was supposed to be set in San Francisco, thus the type of architecture you see. However, Linda’s accent was decidedly East Coast, and it would have been too difficult to constantly explain that she was a transplant. So instead, the show’s creator, Loren Bouchard, says that it’s pretty decidedly set on the Eastern Seaboard. In fact, he goes as far as to say that it’s probably somewhere in New Jersey.

So, that narrowed down my search. From there, I looked for smaller sized cities that had the following nearby landmarks and amenities:

  • An amusement park pier
  • A lighthouse (within a short drive)
  • A taffy factory (per The Belchies)
  • An art festival (per Art Crawl)
  • A seafood festival (Lobsterfest)

Sure enough, there was a place that had all of that, right down to a very old historic taffy factory. That place, and the location of Bobs Burgers if it existed in real life, was Ocean City, NJ.

While it is towards the south, and most fans theorize that the location is somewhere in North Jersey, this place just fit the criteria better. Given nearby Atlantic City, maybe Gene’s dreams of showbusiness aren’t too absurd after all.

Like Something Out Of Tina’s Erotic Friend-Fiction…

…all of our calculations were based on some truth and mostly imagination. Well, with less butts, zombies, and freeform dancing, and more math. Yeah I know, bad trade off, but it still works.

When we get to the hard facts, we had to figure out the price based on what actually existed. So I found similarly sized properties and found the average price per square foot in Ocean City was $387 per square foot. That meant that Bob’s quite large home would cost a grand total of $796,446.

Bob and his family don’t own, they rent. So how much does it cost them? The average rent for buildings this size in this area is about $3,924 per month. Yeah, you can see why Bob is always complaining.

Now, let’s say you were renting and were trying to make ends meet (or meat maybe). Well you’d have to sell about 785 burgers a month to earn just the rent, and that speaks nothing about restaurant costs, clothes, food, utilities, or other expenses. It’s no wonder that everyone’s always scraping for money in the Belcher household. I sure hope Teddy and Mort are hungry.

Come Meat Our Family And Let Us Meat You

So there you have, it all you never wanted to know about Bob’s restaurant and home. Now, this irreverent show pokes fun at everyone, including another of my favorite shows, and never pauses to apologizes.

In true form, we’ve done the same here for everyone’s amusement, especially now that the show is on hiatus again and fans are growing more restless and angsty about its absence. At least, that’s how I’m getting. Above all, this research has been a labor of love and obsession, much like every patty Bob puts on a bun for his customers.

By the way, is anyone else hungry for burgers now? I know I am.

Comments: 18

  • Jenny says:

    SO INTERESTING! :) Isn’t Bob’s Burgers his dad’s old place? Could that possibly add the factor that it may be rent controlled, which is why Mr Fischoeder is so eager to kick them out? Hmm.

  • Charles L says:

    The show centers on the Belcher family, who run a hamburger restaurant on Ocean Avenue in an indeterminate New Jersey shore town, according to series creator Loren Bouchard- Wikipedia
    Ocean City, NJ does fit the show best.

    • Kate says:

      Actually, in the episode Claire mentioned, “It Snakes a Village” they are seen driving from New Jersey to Florida. However, the car is driving from central NJ; right around where I live and I grew up in the town over from where John Roberts, aka, Linda lived/lives (he’s from Edison). Ocean City is WAY too far south from where they’re driving from, so it’s most like the Keansburg area that they’re from. Also…it’s a made up show, so they’re in a made up town in NJ, but it’s central NJ.

  • Claire says:

    In the episode where they go to Florida, it shows a map and they do leave from New Jersey.

  • Cassandra says:

    They serve beer at Bobs Burgers (as shown in the biker gang episode) and Ocean City, NJ is a dry town (meaning it prohibits the sale of alcohol).

    • Kris Kail says:

      The show isn’t exactly set in Ocean City, but the town it IS set in would most closely resemble Ocean City. Property values would probably be worth more in a city like the one in Bob’s Burgers than a dry town, or maybe less depending who you talk to, but I’d say it’s safe to say that this would be an accurate take.

  • Heather says:

    Yes, it can’t be Ocean City because of the drinks. Normally, I wouldn’t be so nitpicky but the amount of this article’s details is awesomely amazing!!

  • Laura Allan says:

    Hey, thanks for reposting this from the blog. :) And really nice to read all the kind comments (Yeah, I ignored the dry county thing because all the other research went the way of ocean city. But SERIOUSLY nice catch, guys!)


    It couldnt be OC jersey.OC Jersey is a dry county and Bob sells beer in his restaurant. So its DEF.NOT IN OCNJ

  • David Weddell says:

    In the biker episode Linda is reading an “Oceanside Times” newspaper. So maybe not Ocean City, but close.

  • says:

    I came here to read the comments.

  • Pat says:

    As someone else stated, OC is a dry town. Being a lifelong resident of NJ’s beach towns, both central and south, I always thought the show had a very Coney Island feel to it. Plus everyone in South Jersey has either no accent or a Philly accent, i.e. “Home” sounds like “Hewm.”

  • mandagras says:

    The customer bathroom is 15 sq feet at best.

  • Elisha Rose says:

    Hes NOT swying IT IS ocean city new jersey. He stated that IF it were to be a city. Ocean city fits the criteria best out of all. Duh

  • scott c says:

    Bobs Burgers cannot be in Ocean City NJ for two reasons. First, there is no cruise ship dock within walking distance of Ocean City, as seen on the episode where there crazy cruise ship captain kidnaps them. And secondly, in the season three premiere it is clearly shown that Bobs has beer on the menu, yet Ocean City is a dry town.

  • meh says:

    You’re forgetting how Bob and his family got the place to begin with, they wouldn’t just be given a house/business and be expected to make payments. They’d put down a downpayment. If they’re renting to own (which is what it seems, no mortgage from a bank–working with landlord Fischeoder who seems to skip the families payments often for doing off the books services) they likely gave Fischeoder a huge downpayment, more than the usual 20% I would wager, but if Fischeoder had trouble with the abandoned shop losing equity he may have allowed Bob to skate by with the usual downpayment, so Bob really owes around 640k which over thirty years makes his rent around 2k per month. This is private financing where Mr F often lets the family skip payments. At the same time the stand needs a business licence and probably a business loan, which the shady Mr. F probably want’s a piece of. The store is probably planning to lose money for a while before the turn around, when the business loan is paid back slower than the personal property loan between Bob and Mr F. Not counting private loans between Bob and his dad, or the money his family got for all sorts of reasons to feel the confidence in starting the business.

    Realistically, a lot of the buisness loan was used up in renovations and re-re-openings as well as defered payments to Mr. F (skip a month, owe 4k next month plus extra services under the table or perhaps even interest.) Unless Mr. F is planning on insurance scams, he probably wants to lean off Bob as the business loan dries up, right when the shop turns their losses into profits by finally having enough customers and all the equipment finally paying itself off. Bob clearly doesn’t work only 8 hours a day, and grabs various opportunities (like the thanksgiving episode)when they come, has a biker gang he once completely took care of and got a massive tip for servicing, and so on. I think while Mr. Fischeoder clearly has taken advantage, and the family is unlucky, their financial situation isn’t unreasonable or overbearing, it’s just more contingent than on-paper perfect economics (which doesn’t really exist in the real world), maybe if Bob saves Mr. F’s life, he can own the restaurant in only 15 years, and so on.

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